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Friday, April 12, 2013

For Not Being Ready...

For not being ready....I'm ready.  My last post was titled Success Out of Failure.  It recounted a rough draft that went from whining about an upcoming race I wasn’t prepared for to a joyous celebration about how surprisingly well my last long run went.

I was on a real high during that brief period.  That was two and a half weeks ago.  I soon started watching the weather and exaggerating the potential every twinge and tingle.  It finally dawned on me that I was looking for an excuse to back out.  No big deal.  Only a few people would know and my family would rather I cut back anyway.

What was it that really caused the doubts?  I honestly can’t say for sure.  So I made a decision....

I registered for the race and booked a hotel.  This is completely like something I would do.  It makes no sense really.  I suppose I just reached the point where I couldn’t say YES and I couldn’t live with NO.  Once the “what if’s” started bouncing around in my head.

-What if it is a great race and I miss out
-What if I completely fall apart and have to DNF
-What if my training is good enough to get by
-What if the weather is terrible
-What if the PR in the half marathon six weeks ago was no fluke
-What if the minor injuries become major injuries and I’m sidelined for awhile

There was only one decision to avoid the likely regret.  Run the darn thing.  Why am I always so negative?

The injury item is real, but without reason.  Sort of like wearing shoes to bed because there might be a house fire.  Who wants to live their life that way?

One thing that I know I need to prepare for is the weather.  My last several marathons have been unseasonably hot.  It is almost as if I travel with the sun.  Oh, but let’s not forget about the humidity.  I promised myself in those race reports that I would NEVER run another marathon in hot humid conditions.  So, moments before I hit the send button on my registration I checked the weather on last time.

Low of 58, High of 72.  Warmer than I’d like.  What about the humidity?  Oh heck, who cares, SEND.  That, my friends, is how you make a hasty decision!  Each day since then the predicted temperature has risen by a degree of more.  By Sunday it will be at least 107.  One other detail I forgot to share.  Southerly winds up to 20 mph.  Awesome!  The last 7 or 8 miles look to be straight into the wind...of course.

Ok, enough of my complaining.  The race is going to be very uncomfortable at times for many reasons.  When you wanna stop and gotta just keep going, everything hurts and it is everyone’s fault.  Why?  Why do I do this?  Who’s idea was this?  I’m too old for this?  Realizing the regret you are having was what you intended to avoid in the first place.  THIS IS MY LAST MARATHON.

Some months later, I will forgive myself and do it again.

Run in Peace, Rest in Grace